WOOD FROM THE ARK,YES IT DOES EXIST.

ATTENTION ALL BUYERS!!!  

WE WILL BE GONE FROM JANUARY 13TH 2015 TO JANUARY 23RD 2015 AND THERE WILL BE NO SHIPPING UNTIL WE ARE ALL BACK. DO NOT THINK WE FORGOT YOU,WE DIDN'T,WE ARE ON INVESTIGATION. THIS INVESTIGATION IS OUT OF THE COUNTRY AND ONE PART IN FLORIDA. SOME OF THE AREAS ARE UNDERGROUND AND THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO RECEPTION TO BE HAD!! IF YOU CAN'T WAIT FOR SHIPPING THEN DO NOT ORDER!

Here's the thing.  Everybody wants to feel like they have something to do with the courses of history.  They want to feel like they have made some type of difference in the world and, hopefully something positive that is going to benefit the masses.  They want to be remembered in history books.  That is why they go over the top to do things-- or in this case find things--  that will not soon be forgotten.  It is also the reason why scams and false reports show up.  This is why in the past, there have been claims of the discoveries of certain religious artifacts that have been found, when all-in-all they really have been bogus.  

For instance, the Noah's Ark Ministry International has not found Noah's Ark.  Although they have made many claims that they have found Noah's Ark, I'd simply like to pose the question, "Can you prove it?"  Well they say that the carbon testing that they did on the Ark dates back to 4,800 year ago, and that it was found in Mount Ararat.  That's all fine and dandy, but that still doesn't prove that whatever they have found is Noak's Ark.  You can leave that part to us, however, because we have authentic artifacts that have come from Noah's Ark.  If you ask me to prove it,  I will simply send you one of these pieces, for the small price of $150.00.  We won't even charge you shipping!  

These pieces are in our possession because shortly after the claim in 2010 that the Ark had been found, we went incognito... like undercover all the way.  It was almost as bad as the time Deedee made me dress up at as an old lady during an investigation in New Jersey.  We always somehow figure our way through things, though.  We are good like that.  We managed to infiltrate the ranks of the Noah's Ark Ministries International.  They had the general coordinates of the Ark correct.  I can tell you they never seen the Ark itself for the simple reason that Deedee had to perform an anti-cloaking spell to uncover the presence of the Ark, as it has been shielded from normal human observance since it landed on the Ark all those years ago.  

Originally, we had sought out to debunk the fact that these dimwits knew what they were talking about, and successfully reveal their hoax.  However, it actually helped us secure the pieces that we ended up coming home with, because we spread these anti-cloaking spells to make sure there wasn't actually anything there; but there was, so either way it all worked out for the best.  However, don't be fooled, because the anti-cloaking spells that we used were very advanced.  I don't any of the people that we were grouped with would have begun to understand it.  Their very scientific, and to scientists there is an explanation for everything.  Magic doesn't exist.  

Either way, when Deedee first uncloaked the Ark I wa taken back with a sensation of awe that I never had before until this time.  Here, in front of us was the Ark that I have learned about since childhood and songs about in Sunday School.  It was just there, hanging out, on the top of a mountain and now I just happened to standing right in front of it.  What happened when we touched the ark was even more amazing.  As I can now tell you without uncertainty-- the angel was not built by Noah alone.  Rather, he was under the influence of of divine, angelic presence being.  You know how they say that people, "fall under the fire of the Holy Ghost?"  Thsi is what happened with him, but his fire burned brighter and hotter than any before, as he was able, as one man, to construct a ship that was half the size of the Titanic.  It's only natural that the boat, being built by a an angelic creature, has magical powers to it.  How do you think it  stayed afloat all those months?  Divine Intervention.  

Divine Intervention is exactly what we received when we laid our hand to rest on the Ark.  When we did we were able to immediately leave our bodies to be teleported to Heaven, where we exited as God exists and we were able to see through God's Eyes.  It allowed us to know all the knowledge of the Book of the Tree-- you know the one that Adam and Eve got kicked out Eden for discovering?  It allowed us to know and identify and call by name all the angels of Heaven, and the creatures, and the hosts.  They were able to give us all the knowledge of all white light magic.  We could see into the Seven Mansions of God to behold the Tables of Time, whereby we could see all the past and the future.  We were given the ability to see the Scroll of Destiny, which has given us the power to control our own and to get whatever we want whether that be fame, power, wealth, luck, love, etc.  Just by touching the Ark we were given this tremendous experience, which left us both invigorated with raw power for nearly a month, with not ever having to lay hands on the Ark after that one visit.  

Now we have been able to collect pieces from the Ark.  By this I mean splinters of would from the Ark.  Don't worry, we didn't ruin anything. We merely took a few chips of wood.  The boat is fine and look better than ever.  It hasn't even aged a bit.  It is still in the same condition it was when the angelic presence that took over Noah's body created it!  It is a timeless invention!  Either way, the pieces in these wood chips, will give those who use them the same experience that Deedee and I had when we touched the Ark.  Where a Deedee and I did eventually our powers after not returning to the Ark to cop another feel, you will never lose your powers, as long as you make a close bond to your piece and you keep it your person in some way shape or form!  You're going to love this piece.  I guarantee it!