WILMER THE LUCKY BASTARD
WILMER THE LUCKY BASTARD

WILMER THE LUCKY BASTARD

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The Civil War Keeps Finding Wilmer McLean

When the American Civil War erupted in 1861, Wilmer McLean of Virginia was too old and "whatever" for warfighting. Unfortunately, he also happened to live smack dab on the road between Washington, DC and Richmond, VA, the respective capitals of the Union and Confederacy.

The first battle of the Civil War pretty much happened at this guy's place. The Battle of Bull Run, broke out on July 21, 1861 near Manassas, Virginia--McLean's hometown. Confederate Gen. P.G.T. Beauregard needed a building to serve as headquarters for his staff and many initials, and when he saw Wilmer McLean's cozy house, he figured "what the hell..." and camped there.

This immediately subjected the building to artillery fire, and one cannonball somehow found its way down the poor bastard's chimney. The entire building should have gone up like the Death Star, yet miraculously no one was hurt.

But, hey, an insane amount of fighting occurred along that road. A lot of people between Richmond and DC could say a battle happened on their front lawn. And, after this narrow escape with the Reaper in his very own home, McLean figured that moving his family out of No Man's Land would be a smart bet.

However, the man took so long to skip town that when 1862 rolled around, a battle nearly twice as large and four times as bloody exploded just outside his front door again--the Second Battle of Bull Run. After dodging this second bullet, the size of Civil War battlefield, McLean finally sold and moved his family as far away as he could afford.

When Wilmer settled on a cottage in Clover Hill, Virginia, the town that later changed its name to Appomattox Court House. By 1865, Robert E. Lee's "invincible" Army of North Virginia was too busy having the ever-loving shit kicked out of it by General Ulysses S. Grant of the Union Army to defend Richmond. So after abandoning their capital, Lee's sorry-excuse-for-an-army was chased by Grant all across Virginia to, where else but, Appomattox Court House.

The armies of the Civil War, taking the battle to wherever Wilmer happened to be that day.

On April 9, 1865, General Lee officially surrendered to Ulysses S. Grant, effectively ending the American Civil War. The site for his surrender: the parlor of Wilmer McLean's new home.

Once the two armies left (and helped themselves to some furniture as souvenirs), the now-bankrupt McLean remarked: "The war began in my front yard and ended in my front parlor," which is probably the classiest way a man can handle the single most shit-luck in American history.

** These cuff links/earrings were Wilmer's and noted as his lucky charms -- these saved his life from all this despair -- and will prosper the extreme luck to you! His wife purchased these to wear as earrings, as they are screw backs for non-pierced ears, but Wilmer liked them and used them as cufflinks on his shirts!

 

You never know what will happen in your life, so be prepared with the sanctity of luck by getting these eternal charms of generating power to ensure your life is great!