Transmortality-- For Those of You Who are Somewhere in Between
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When I was little my mother told me that I could be anything I wanted to be when I grow up. Most parents would tell their children something like that. You know, meaning something like if you work hard and stay in school, you'll make an awesome dentist. Practice makes perfect if you want to be a world renown violinist. However, in today's society we take that just a tad bit to far. We had Bruce Jenner as a transracial, meaning despite the fact that he was born a man, he feels like a woman-- and damn it, if he wants to be a woman, let him. We have Rachel Dolezal as a transracial, because sometimes white is just not right. Don't even get me started on those people who call themselves transhuman. They dress up like dogs and search out their human masters. Then, they are fed and walked and sniff each others butts, just like a real dog would do. I mean, the list goes on and on and on. In fact, anytime you want to be something different in American, all you have to do is preface it with "trans" and its this trendy new thing that people just adore. I guess I'm not fat. I'm just transthin-- you know, because I wasn't born to be fat.
Whatever the case may be, the real issue of "trans" came before Bruce or Rachel. It was called the Transfiguration. It happened when Jesus Christ took a few of his disciples up the side of a mountain, to the very top. When they reached the apex some really awesome stuff happened. First and foremost, Jesus took a completely new form. He was shimmery and light shown from his very body. He began to speak and when his disciples could finally make out with whom he was speaking, it was the post mortem version of the prophets Elijah and Moses. They had also undergone a complete transfiguration and they appeared all angelic and stuff as well. The disciples thought this was the bees-knees until God decided to join the party. According to them a loud voice like thunder came from the sky and told them to listen to all that the Son of Man has to tell them. The voice shook the mountain and of course the mortal men were frightened, finding themselves face down in the dirt. Jesus must have felt bad and sent his dad away, because when the apostles got up all they saw was mortal Jesus and nothing else.
The point in me telling you all of this is that we had an exclusive chance to use a time-travel piece that we were testing. You know that sometimes we have no control over where we go when we are using these pieces. We often hope that we don't end up somewhere on the beach of Normandy during WWII. We haven't yet. This time we were transported-- we believe my no coincidence-- to the summit of the mountain where the Holy Transfiguration occurred on the mount. While we watched what took place, you better believe that we channeled the energy of our experience into this piece. It will now give you what we are calling Transmortality.
What is transmortality? It is this thing where you will be able to receive temporary immortality for the purposes of traveling directly in the Holy of Holies in Heaven. This is a very sacred place, where God keeps his most sacred prophets and saints. There are not more than a dozen of the most powerful to have ever lived. For some reason that number twelve just keeps popping up. It's basically 4 (the number of life) times three (the number of the divine trinity). There are other reasons, but that's not important right now. I personally believe that the twelve apostles were these twelve reincarnated, but I have no evidence to support my theory. Either way, the fact is that this piece gives you temporary immortality, so that way you can experience ascension into the Holy of Holies in Heave. While you are there you can ask these twelve for any white light power you want and they have been vested the power of God and will grant all of your requests. It's like having your own group of white light djinn, except you get to visit and experience Heaven and they are much more powerful. They can literally accomplish anything you ask them for. They can turn any desired into a granted power. I mean, they've been given the powers of directly by God to be able to grant whatever they want. With this piece, you will fall into their good graces and they will grant you whatever you ask them for. It's a pretty incredible thing.
If transmortality is your thing and you want to experience the powers of becoming an immortal, but retain your mortal form, then this is your piece. Not to mention the fact that you gain the ability to accomplish virtually everything you want. Move over Jenner, this is the next big thing! Don't miss your chance as transmortality. Make this piece yours today!